Imaginary fame, FTW

I've recently been fantasizing about what my life would be like if it involved more music and fame and less art. This has consisted of me listening to a lot of hip-hop/techno/other funky nonsense and "break dancing" regularly when nobody's watching. My moves got so intense the other day, I actually ripped a hole in my PJs. No lie.

Because I'm basically famous in my mind, I decided to recruit my high-profile posse. It goes as follows:

Zach Galifianakis (as Kanye West)
I need a guy who can bring both the laughs and the rhymes. Clearly, The Nakis delivers. He's not afraid to make an ass of himself in public, which means he would be hilarious to watch while simultaneously making me look awesome. I would be the straight man next to him. The Abbott, if you will.
(Kanye himself was originally going to make this list, but his fashion sense outshines my own. Sometimes.)

Chef Gordon Ramsay
I don't need an entourage of 7-feet-tall security guards to keep things under control. This guy can handle anything, 'cause he's British and likes to cuss a lot. Plus, he can probably make a gourmet meal out of vending machine food, so that's nice. He'd be like my MacGyver, but better. *Will be replaced with the real MacGyver after calling me filthy names in public.

Pam Beasley
Obviously, I need a celebrity BFF. I don't care if she's a made-up character, she's definitely necessary. She likes artsy stuff and would totally keep my things organized and answer my cell phone when I'm too busy signing autographs. We also share the same level of fashion savvy, so she won't judge me when I refuse to shop for new clothes (unless it's online).

Justin Timberlake
What doesn't this man do? He's responsible for performing/mixing/producing all the CDs that go in my ride. JT will also perform incredible dance solos when I need a diversion in awkward situations. For example: "What's that, officer? I was speeding?" *Justin Timberlake proceeds to distract, I drive away unscathed by the law.*

Ben Franklin, duh

For all my spending needs.

Being famous is my imagination is awesome. I get all these great celebrity buddies, PLUS I get to keep my real friends, too. Who could compete with that?